I honestly don't know, but again I have the itch to write about my life, and what the hey, might as well make it public cause most of my family is everywhere but here. Not that they are all that interested in my life, but I figure I can let them decide.
So to those who decide that reading a blog that I am writing is a good idea, welcome.
This new year is not only speeding on by, but I am also finding it hard to really slow down. January was like a tornado at work and I barely kept my feet on the ground I was constantly trying not to fall behind. Sadly I did, but I am getting back up to speed. Not only is work crazy busy, but so is just basic life. Being a married adult is not easy, nor should it be I guess.
Jared and I have accomplished a lot in the time that we have been married. We prepared for sacred blessings in the Temple, received them, and got sealed for time and all eternity. We both were laid off from our jobs and got new ones all within 2016, and in the meantime we have accomplished paying off over $12,000 of credit card debt in the last 18 months. We have a beautiful home, an annoying dog, two working cars, and employment. We are very blessed and I have to say that is all I keep feeling. We have had some very financially sparse times, but the Lord has pulled us through in ways I cannot explain. We have cultivated the spirit in our home and we have grown stronger and more in love in just the 2.5 years we have been married. This is starting to sound like a very late Christmas Card. and I guess it kinda is.
Jared and I serve in our ward as Primary teachers to incredible 8 to 11 year old boys. Incredible spiritual giants we get to see grow up and gain the priesthood duties. In fact one of our students turned twelve a few weeks ago and is now passing the Sacrament. I cry every time I watch him preform this wonderful ordinance. He glows, even though he is just learning. It is times like these that I yearn for my own children.
A few months ago I received an answer to my pondering about when we should start a family. As you might know, I am not a healthy weight, and I have struggled much of my adult life trying to lose the extra weight, so that I can feel more comfortable about having healthy children. I was reminded by the Spirit that I need to have FAITH, and that it was time that Jared and I look to Lord and be prepared to do as we are commanded, and what we yearn to have.
I have spent many hours on the internet reading blogs and saw my doctor, all have positive reports and tons of support. Not only that, but I have been trying to walk at least a mile 5 times a week and the support on social media from family and friends has been phenomenal! Thank you all. We have had little time with Jared's job change and horrible weather to get out and go, but we will soon and keep you all up to date on that as well.
Most of you know that I have conquered a lot of mental health issues from the past. They are still there, but with therapy and with the Atonement I have come a long way. One thing that I have had a hard time ridding myself of is a very negative statement that repeats in my head as it was vomited into me as emotional abuse 11 years ago. " You are fat and ugly and no one else will love you." Jared often reminds me that he loves me, that I am beautiful and not "Fat" to him. (Seriously, I married that amazing of a man.) And I decided to post up a sign to change the words in my head. It states, " I am BEAUTIFUL, I am HEALTHY and JARED LOVES ME." Even though I am not at my healthiest, and though I don't often find myself pretty, this lets me have a positive affirmation and it clears the negativity from my mind. I have only had it up since the beginning of the year, and already I hear more positive feedback from my mind and soul.
Guys, you have listened enough to me tonight, but I want to post this picture of us, it is a silly picture, but it is us and I love us.
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